2chibiplatespooky:
And how my own college has literally screwed me over entirely.
I have been having panic attacks caused by my depression and anxiety. On Monday I had the worst panic attack of my life, and attempted suicide. Obviously I failed (because Tylenol can’t kill you just ruins your stomach and liver) Rae had found me in my room and took me to safety and security on my campus who then called an ambulance and I spent the rest of that day at the hospital.
Usually after my panic attacks I feel fine and this time I realized that I needed to seek help. At first my college (Seattle Pacific University) seemed very ready to help; when I came back to campus they had me meet with the student councilor who I really liked and once I had finished talking to him I really felt excited about meeting with him and talking things out, and figuring out if I should start medication.
My school still made it clear that at the time they wanted me to stay off of campus till things were resolved. They had told me that they still had to decide what would be best for me; though at this point I was under the impression I would be returning to classes by Monday.
The next day I returned to campus to talk to the RLC’s who are the resident life staff. Here is the mission statement of the RLC’s:
- Provide a residential community founded on Christian faith and values.
- Provide residential housing facilities that are safe and welcoming.
- Train and supervise student leaders.
- Offer co-curricular programming according to student developmental needs.
- Operate a fair and just disciplinary process.
- Advise residence hall councils.
I went to meet with one of them, and they had told me that they decided that the best thing was to put me on a medical leave, and not come back till spring quarter next year. Also if I want to come back I am supposed to have met with a therapist on my own time and money.
So instead of having free therapy from my school and easy access to medication they think that dumping me is better.
This school was so important to me and getting a degree was my top goal at the moment, but because this school sees me as a liability rather than a person that just needs some help they are literally putting my life on pause.
They continued to tell me that they really did care about me and what was best for me, but they probably didn’t know who I was until this Monday. Even my mother who has known me for 20 years agreed that this was a horrible decision.
I now have to move out by tomorrow and find a new place to live.
They have put my life to a screeching halt.
I’m being torn away from my school and my friends, and basically being expected to get all the help I need on my own.
This school says they care, but basically they are telling me I’ve screwed up, slapping me and sending me on my way.
And if you were all wondering, I refuse to return back to this campus in the spring.
So yeah. I just wanted other people to hear how this school handles students who really need help.
I’ve been with Sarah every step of the way in this process. We have been fighting this as hard as we can, pulling any strings we can, trying to keep her here at school where she has access to her job, her friends, medical treatment that doesn’t require insurance, and free counseling.
We have been told the same thing, over and over. “It’s what we think is in her best interest.”, but when we try to explain the situation, we get nods, sympathetic eyes, and then sent on our way. At one point, as one of the Residence Life Coordinators was doing his spiel about how much they care about Sarah, I started shaking my head to myself. He noticed, called me out on it, and asked if I had something to say. I got two words out, “You can’t—” and he held up a hand, and asked me to leave so he could talk to Sarah on her own. While she was vulnerable and hurt and upset.
We’ve been trying to get help anywhere we can on this campus— the Student Counseling Center won’t help, Residence Life hasn’t helped so far, nobody is listening to us and they all just keep saying the same thing over and over.
They’re trying to push a student who attempted suicide away from a place where she can have easily accessible treatment, because that’s what they think is “best for her”.
Sarah is not data for a statistic. She is not a paragraph scrawled on a piece of paper from a counselor’s office. She is not a liability.
She is a human being, and deserves to be treated like one.
Please, if you can, just spread the word. SPU’s not taking care of their students like they should. If you have friends or parents or anyone who is an alumni of this place, let them know. If you have any connections here, let them know. We are not going down without a fight.
Update: After more meetings, the school is still trying to force Sarah out.
The decision apparently rested with the head of the Student Counseling Center, who, despite having never met with or analyzed Sarah personally for this situation, thinks that leaving would be in her best interest. They want her out by Monday, October 15th.
We have sent emails pleading with him to change his decision, outlining the factors influencing our belief that she should stay, and have simply gotten the response of: “I realize you can’t see it now, I don’t expect you to be able to”. After that response, I sent another email to him, again trying to lay out our cause, beliefs, and evidence, but have not yet received a reply. This man apparently has a packed enough schedule that he cannot find the time to see us in person and listen to our appeal, even though other members of the staff at the Student Counseling Center have outright stated that Sarah and her case are “currently the top priority”.
